Matt: What’s up guys and welcome to the first episode of flash mob, a new show where we play- Ryan: Flash mob?
Matt: It’s not called flash mob, I’m sorry
Ryan: Fucking idiot Matt: Sup guys welcome to f- Ryan: Good one Matt: Sup guys welcome to the first episode of flash flood, a new show where we play a flood of shitty flash games Matt: So, Ryan you wanna start us off?
Ryan: Yeah let’s just.. What do you think we’ll find if we just
M&R: Just flash games Matt: What are we gonna find? Ryan: Let’s go to flash-games.net Matt: Flash-game.net. It’s not flash games its’s flash game Ryan: Ooh.. I have to zoom in cause my eyes are shit…
Matt: Yeah I can’t see shit to be honest Ryan: Ok here we go that’s much better… Um
Matt: Keep going Ryan: Remember I’m gonna choose one and then I’m gonna hand it off and you choose one Matt: Ok sounds good, sounds like a good format Ryan: So I can choose whatever I want without your judgement right? Fuck I didn’t mean- Matt: There’s an ad Ryan: Sorry. Without your judgement I can choose whatever I want. Right? Matt: Of course Ryan: Sorry I really like the title of this one
Matt: Sushi showdown? Ryan: Yeah
Matt: You’ve gotta zoom out boy Ryan: Fuck
Matt: Gotta make that back to 100
Ryan: Shit M&R: Where’s the game?
Matt: Oh the game will start in 6 seconds Ryan: Oh okay
Matt: You’ve gotta watch the ad Ryan: *while burping* Sushi Showdown!
Matt: Hm.. That’s good
Ryan: Is now loading Ryan: We got Naruto online Matt: We got berators.. I think that says liberators but the ad’s too- Ryan: Halloween games
Matt: Yeah Halloween games Ryan: Okay ready?
Matt: Yeah let’s play it Matt: Hm… That’s definitely a flash game
*Ryan laughing* Matt: Gotta love that flash style, it’s good Ryan: What do I do? Matt: W to jump Matt:That’s a good uh…
Ryan: I can run up walls?
Matt: Oh dude shoot the tnt Ryan: And then.. aw man it’s a full keyboard thing so Ryan: K! K. Ryan: So uh.. This is interesting Ryan: It’s stupid
Matt: I know Ryan: *Burps*
Matt: That’s good! It’s a good game Ryan: Okay well that was fun Matt, I beat the first level of that Ryan: Now I’m gonna hand it off to Matt Ryan: There’s so many Matt: I don’t know man there’s some good uh..Some good fucking Matt: Sexy speed test?
Ryan: Woo! Ooh Matt: Undressing Staci! Matt: What’s sweet anals? Matt: Oh no, Sweet Anais sory
*Ryan laughing* Ryan: Granny’s BBQ Matt: Satisfy your curiousity… What? Matt: Where’s Granny’s BBQ? Did I pass it?
Ryan: It’s up it’s up it’s one of the Matt: Where the fuck did it go?
Ryan: It’s coming
M&R: There it is Matt: Oh God another fucking ad
Ryan: Branders. Ryan: Branders…
Matt: That’s factory direct printing Matt: Stop! Get out of here!
Matt: Fucking ad, what is this shit? Ryan: Oooh
Matt: Shit that’s a lot of coupons! Matt: Just gotta wait for it to load Matt: Yep…
Ryan: Almost there Matt: It’s going Matt: It’s goin about as slow as a Granny am I right? Matt: Guess I gotta pick a different fucking game cause Granny’s BBQ doesn’t wanna load Ryan: I’m sorry about that Matt I know how much you like your… Grandma inspired flash games Matt: Run Jim Run? *Ryan Laughing*
Matt: This one’s about Ryan’s step dad Matt: Oh this looks pretty good! Matt: *Reading the text on screen*
*Ryan still laughing* Matt: What’s the- Oh christ Ryan: Is that the Mario jump sound? From like Super Mario World?
Matt: No Matt: It’s original Ryan Matt: Okay so uh…
Ryan: You can probably climb the rope Matt: You can’t move and jump it looks like Ryan: There you go
Matt: Oh! I’m on the rope Ryan: Now just go over there
Matt: Damn, he slidin’ on that shit Matt: Oh, okay!
Ryan: I wonder if he- you’re gonna- oh dude you’re about to fucking swing Matt: Oh I’m gonna swing on that hook aren’t I? Ryan: Yeah you’ve just gotta jump on the box
Matt: Get up there.. There you go, climb up that Ryan: This reminds me of Portal cause uh-
Matt: Yes! Ryan: These are some difficult puzzles Matt: This is just like Portal Matt: Oh shit there’s fire in this one Ryan: Warning Matt: Dude look at me go! Yeah! Matt: Oh yeah! Ryan: Oh be careful for this one dude
Matt: Am I supposed to kill him? Ryan: No he’s- Oh no
Matt: Shit, shit, fuck
Ryan: No! Matt: That’s just the Mario sound
Ryan: Yeah that’s definitely Mario Matt: Am I supposed to kill him?
Matt: Oh shit no he killed me!
Ryan: He’s Hitman Stan! Matt: Fucking Hitman Stan- wait what? Ryan: I think it’s time to switch games Matt: Yeah I think this one’s broken Ryan: I got something! You might call this one a play on words, a pun if you will, Matthew Matt: Okay
Ryan: Okay Ryan: Um
Matt: Still breaking down there Ryan: Boom
Matt: Oh dude flash GAYmes! Haha! Matt: Mathematics BoyZone!
*Ryan Laughing* Ryan: Ma- Wait- Check your ability to quickly
Matt: Assum.. Assume? Matt: Yo it’s Mathematics BoyZone you know what I’m sayin Ryan: Well there’s his little nutsack, the bottom of his nutsack right there
Matt: Have to censor that out! Matt: 5-3 Hurry! You’re running out of time
Ryan: What’s 5-3.. T-Two Ryan: Got it!
Matt: Nice! Matt: Oh!
*Ryan Laughing Again* Ryan: 5-2 is three
Matt: Three Ryan: Okay!
Matt: Yes dude you did it right! Matt: Good Job!
Ryan: Let’s see- Let’s see Ryan: Oh dude! Yeah!
*Matt Laughing* Ryan: Love that…
Matt: He’s got a small penis! Ryan: I love that bush goin’ on Matt: It’s not even erect! Why would he do a shoot-
Ryan: Where are his balls?
Matt: I don’t know! Ryan: Ugh.. 14+15
Matt: 29 *Ryan Moans*
*Matt Laughs* Ryan: Is that 14-7?
Matt: The look on his face he’s like *humming* Matt: You better- You’re not good at math!
Ryan: Is that 14-7? Matt: 14-7+8
Ryan: Okay Matt: Is that it?
Ryan: That’s all I needed to know yeah Matt: Oh wow you did it Ryan: That’s 17, is 17+6 23? Matt: Uh– Yeah Matt: There you go! That’s good! Ryan: Uh
Matt: 19+18 Ryan: Um- uh, hold on that’s gonna be um 37?
Matt: 37? Ryan: Woo!
Matt: Yeah alright Matt: How many-
Ryan: Dude! Yeah we got undernut! Matt: Yeah!
Ryan: Ok so 25-6.. 19 motherfuckers Matt: No wait- Yeah 29- Yeah Ryan: 4-0?
Matt: Its 4! They’re trying to trick us here Ryan: Ugh you can see the little-
Matt: Little hanging down right there Ryan: Is this just the same guy? Matt: You can see his little prunes hanging down
Ryan: Is this the same fucking guy? Matt: Yeah I think.. Yeah Ryan: Jesus
Matt: Hurry Hurry! Matt: 15+ FUCK
Ryan: Uh fuck I don’t know! Ryan: F-Shit
Matt: Uh, ten, 9+30
M&R: 39 Ryan: *Moans* Matt: Oh my God Ryan: These are just the same pictures now! Matt: No no no we’ve gotta get somewhere! We’re getting somewhere! Ryan: Are we?
Matt: Yeah look, level 13/22 Ryan: 31+18 I don’t know.. 30 plus
Matt: Whats 30+19 Matt: 59
Matt: It’s 59 Ryan: *Sighs*
Matt: What? *i’m crying how did they not get that they even made it simpler for themselves istg* *Matt Laughs*
Ryan: Woah! He’s just spreading there!
Matt: Woah! Ryan: Okay!
Matt: It looks like a sock filled with batteries
Ryan: Jesus Matt: He’s got an interesting shaped penis Ryan: W- Okay. Matt: 49+6
Ryan: Oh.. It’s gonna be… 54 Matt: 55! Matt: Fuck!
Ryan: No! I pressed the- No!
M&R: Fuck! Ryan: *Screraming* No! Matt: Ryan clicked a link, it brought us to one of these websites Ryan: We gonna get a virus on the Grump computer? Matt: Um.. No? Matt: You wanna try typing games? Try some typing games
Ryan: Yeah of course Matt: Um
Ryan: I feel like this is… the way to get a virus Matt: This is definitely the way to get a virus Ryan: We should- we should not- we should just
Matt: Download now Matt:Should I dowload now?
Ryan: I don’t- Nah Matt: Tipeing games Ryan: Tipeing games. It’s a- it’s a country in Japan M&R: A country in Japan
*Ryan laughing* Matt: Keyboarding games for kids Ryan: Ooooh Matt: Oh Shit! Matt: Whoa chill with the intro! Ryan: Um.. Don’t let him get the cherries
Matt: Is that a zero?
Ryan: Zero! Matt: Okay M&R: Five Matt: Nine
Ryan: Is it only numbers? Matt: It said letters and numbers Matt: That’s a zero?
Ryan: Yep Matt: Dude I don’t have my glasses on I can’t see shit
Ryan: Four Ryan: Want me to call them out to you?
Matt: Yeah call them out to me Ryan: Four Ryan: Two Ryan: Five Matt: This is not very hard
Ryan: U Ryan: H Matt: Oh bomb, I gotta type bomb Ryan: Come on!
Matt: I just did it
Ryan: Oh there you go Matt: Oh shit he took-
Ryan: No! Matt: Fuck!
Ryan: No! Matt: Oh fuck! Matt: Oh lid! Lid! Um.. Ryan: Matt I’m fucking upset right now! Matt: Chill dude Jesus Christ
Ryan: Oh my God! Ryan: Ugh!
Matt: It’s not that big a deal Ryan fucking chill Ryan: But you’re losing at a video game! Matt: Oh what’s this?
M&R: New Mario game Matt: Alright new Mario game! Matt: Oh that’s not-
Ryan: It’s legitimately a new Mario game Matt: Nintendo really links shit on websites like that? M&R: Free Mario games online! Matt: What the hell Ryan: Uh…
Matt: Oh I get it! He’s in a shopping cart it’s Mario Cart Ryan: Uh, duh Ryan: Super easy
Matt: Why you doing easy Ryan? Ryan: Cause
Matt: You a big pussy?
Ryan: Yeah Matt: You got a vagina? Ryan: I got a huge fucking labia-
Matt: Need some tampons Ryan?
Ryan: -with your- with your fucking tongue on it Matt: What?
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Matt: Go! Go! Ryan: I’m pressing- Ohhhh it’s the arrows Matt: Of course it’s the arrows
Ryan: I thought it was .. WASD Matt: This is intense for a flash game Ryan: This is interesting Ryan: Oh I need- Oh no-
Matt: Holy shit dude! This is awesome!
Ryan: FUCK Ryan: No! Matt: Whoa
Ryan: This is awful Matt: Yeah~ Just ~ The Mario Cart
Ryan: Yeah~ Mario Cart~ *Ryan Screams* Ryan: Oh– Fucking banana
Matt: Ryan I swear to God you’re fucking fourth place Ryan: I- I worked hard- FUCK YOU! Ryan: Fucking FUCK
Matt: Woooooo! There you go Matt: Oh shit you’re first, you’re first!
*Ryan Screaming* *Ryan Screaming*
Matt: You’re gonna do it!
Ryan: Oh come on! Matt: Oh What?
Ryan: What? Ryan: Oh wait okay good
Matt: Okay Ryan: I won
Matt: That’s it? I thought it would be a more exciting finish Ryan: Well I didn’t do career mode okay I did single race Matt: Start advertising on Youtube… Matt: Ryan we can get Youtube ad revenue Ryan: Click it
Matt: Wait, we can make money on Youtube? Matt: Social Dysphoria the game Matt: OH SHIT! Matt: Check it out dude I can add the extension and get Minecraft for free! Ryan: For Google Chrome? Matt: Add ArcadeFrontier Ads? Matt:This free extension allows us to display a limited number of ads on your computer. What? Matt: So this extension just puts more ads on my computer Ryan: Reviews Matt, see what the people think! Matt: *Reading the review* Matt: So how did I go from clicking Minecraft- to get- How did I get here from Minecraft? Ryan: Uh
Matt: I just wanted to play Minecraft dude Matt: Yo get some King of The Hill shit up in there Ryan: Yo Hank Hill-
Matt: Yo Dude
Ryan: Flash Game Matt: Yeah, Alright Ryan: Did I spell that right
Matt: Yeah that’s not right but Matt: Hank Hill Smokes Marijuana Flash Game Vault Ryan: *Reading what’s on screen* Matt: Remember, you’ve gotta be constantly smoking it. Ryan: Ok so Ryan: What? *Laughing*
Matt: The background music that’s great Ryan: Sell propane Matt: Oh he’s- No No
Ryan: Fuck! Matt: Oh dude Ryan: replay it
Matt: You died Ryan: Let’s do this
Matt: Play it again Ryan: Oh toke Matt: Yeah you gotta toke it up. Your addiction level you gotta keep-
Ryan:Fuck *Matt laughing* Ryan: Come on
*Matt Laughing* Matt: Oh your addiction level
Ryan: NO!! Matt: No wait what’s that say? Matt: I could never love you the way I love marijuana Ryan: Hank Hil need pot so bad that he killed Peggy *Matt laughing*
Ryan: You loose Matt: So you gotta sell propane, toke up a little bit, and I’m all out of hemp Matt: So I gotta buy-
Ryan: Yeah but what do those numbers represent like, is 105 something? Matt: What? Ryan: Is that 100- buy hemp 105 and then- Matt: No that’s 10$ Ryan: Oh Matt: See I’m using all my money, and then I’m toking up Matt: So then my addiction level is super high
Ryan: So wait can you toke up as much as you want? Matt: No cause I’m all out of hemp Matt: So I sell propane-
Ryan: Oh Matt: Which gets me money, which then I buy hemp with, and toke up Ryan: Oooh Ryan: Okay
Matt: I mean that’s how the world works Ryan: Do you unlock more stuff Matt: I don’t know I’m just b- I’m selling propane right now. Matt: Fuck Ryan:This is wonderful Matt: This is the best flash game I’ve ever played in my life. Ryan: Well this was a very interesting series of games I would say. Matt: Yeah that was uh- This has zero comments Matt: Log in with Facebook Ryan: Continue as Ross
*Both laughing* Ryan: That’s his Facebook Ryan: That’s his Facebook what if he doesn’t like- He doesn’t want his Aunt or- Matt: Ok well it does his Twitter Ryan: Okay *laughing*